My daughter is again sick. Not really sick, but a cold and a cough. She is fever-less, but the cough keeps her up at night. Which keeps me up at night. It also makes her grumpy to not feel great. Which makes me grumpy. I hate walking the balance of being nice cause she is sick and not letting her get away with things she should know not to do. And when she is this grumpy, nothing, absolutely nothing, is right. I get that 2 is a stage, and when she is healthy, it is a stage I really love. She is funny, smart, and understanding things at an alarming rate. When she is sick, it tries every ounce of my patience and I start to think I should give her to someone else for half a year because obviously single parenting is not successfully attainable in my case. Yes, I know that is crazy talk, I know it is not the case, that I am a good mother. It is a case where my heart says I can’t even when my mind says I can. I also know it isn’t her that is the issue, it is my own insecurities and inability to know I can manage this on my own without family in the area. OK, now I am just talking, because I am just tired. I need to stop talking and eat. Maybe I will get some rest tonight.